Sunday, August 7, 2016

The journey from Thursday

Her general decline started back in July 24, after she threw up. She had a great vet visit July 22, and then saturday I fed her chicken broth with kibble and she threw up and had diarheea. And then she went on deworning meds on that Tuesday, because the vet intern said she had worns. That started her general decline. Blood in stool, etc.

We took her back to the vet Thursday a week ago, then last Sunday and then on Thursday again of this last week for an ultrasound.

Saturday, Aug. 6: Well, Holly seemed to be doing poorly, but then I dissolved her appetite stimulant in water, shot it down her throat. Half hour later, she ate some chicken by hand, but then I fed her the low salt ham from Boars head with sweet potato and pumpkin "burritos" and she ate like about a cup of those. that was v. encouraging, plus suddenly after she drank water, she wanted to play! her tail was up after being droopy all morning. I wonder if holding off on the fluids has helped. Maybe she drank so much water yesterday she felt bloated? One day at a time, but it was v. heartening to see she had energy back. I'm doing these private posts to keep track of what works. On the down side, cookie doesn't want to eat! She is drinking a lot too, so I fear she may have kidney failure as well. I don't know. It's a challenge, always.

Aug. 6: Can't stop crying. Damn. I have to stop this. Life goes on. I love my dogs so much, they are family, and watching her decline reminds me of watching my mom die from cancer. So many I've lost to disease. Frank is rattled, very much so. But we have to go on with our lives. I think we will take her back to CSAH and it will be the last time. She is not getting better. She never will. She will join Dolce in heaven, and Tiger, Tia, Rainy, all the other dogs we have loved and lost. We are not adopting anymore or getting any more dogs. It's too heartbreaking to watch them decline and then have to make that terrible decision to put them to sleep.

Aug. 6, 9 a.m.: Sitting outside, waiting for the guy from home depot to measure the guest bathroom. V. Depressed. Holly isn't doing well. She drinks too much water. She woke me up twice to get down so she could drink. Now, although she had a nice poop outside, her tail is down and she looks depressed. She ate a little fried egg from my dunkin d sandwich. No fluids until noon in hopes of getting her to eat. I'm worn out, emotionless and physically, trying to cope with the fact that our beloved dog is dying and nothing we can do will stop it. But at least the pumpkin she ate yesterday did help.

Sat. August 6: Rough rough night. Holly would eat only ham with a little pumpkin in it, hand fed, despite the appetite stimulant. She kept drinking and drinking. . I cried. I fried turkey and she ate only a little. Sent frank to the store for low sodium ham and she wouldn't eat that. I fear she is declining. Told frank she would not be with us thru christmas. Cried again. I just know.

Aug. 5, 2:44 p.m. Friday: The BW from August 4 is "normal" except for the creatine, of course, and the BUN. Creatine was 2.1. the BUN is very high, alarmingly, 104. It was 74 on Sunday and 51 on Thursday. Still, Dr. Perez isn't worried because that fluctates. She thinks it means a GI bleed. But her other BW is fine. Normal. No anemia or anything. So that was good. I'm going to try not to worry. Try.

Aug. 5: Today was a fussy day. Holly ate a little chicken, but didn't want her pills. Wanted the Boar's head ham, so I fed her appetite stimulant pill with it. An hour later, she was hungry but fussy. Would not eat the chicken nor the boiled egg I bought. Or the sweet potato mixed into the chicken. So i mashed sweet potato and pumpkin, and then mixed ham. Still would not eat that. Then I made "burritos" out of the sweet potato and pumpkin and rolled the mixture into the ham. She ate that. About a cup of that, and then some ham. No blueberries. No interest in applesauce or carrots. I think she has a blockage. It could be a bleeding tumor not picked up on u/s or bloodwork. But I'm going to keep trying the best I can. I am worn out from shopping, cooking and trying to feed the dog. It's 2:40 and all I have done is manage to clean up the fridge. But if it means restoring her to some health, it's worth it.

August 5: Friday: We took Holly to the vet yesterday and the ultrasound is clear. BW shows normal too, except for the kidney failure, of course. Fecal was negative for parasites. Vet thinks she has a GI bleed, and that is causing the poor stool output and the poor appetite. So she gave us a slew of meds.
Already Holly's appetite perked up on the appetite stimulant yesterday. Still can't get her to eat her kidney dog food, but she ate a lot more chicken and blueberries than before. The vet is cautiously optimistic that Holly doesn't have cancer. The only way to tell, of course, is an endoscopy, but that means anesthesia, and we can't do that to her with the kidney failure.
She has more energy, and seems perkier, playing with her toys, so we are hopeful the GI bleeding will resolve with the meds. We are pretty much emotionally wrung out, thinking the worst, and now that we have a plan to restore her back to health as much as possible, we are feeling more optimistic. The photo is the dry erase board I bought yesterday to keep track of her meds. Yup, there are a LOT.

July 28: Writing has presented a huge challenge this month after I turned in the last book. I am burned out, but I finally managed to finish the synopsis and the first chapter for the next proposal for Book 3 for HQ romantic suspense. Two more chapters to write! The painter stripped off all the wallpaper from the guest bathroom and tomorrow he will paint. He did all that, I finished a chapter, and I'm still waiting on the vet to call back about what I can do for Holly. I managed to coax her into eating a handful of whole grain noodles, some boiled chicken and five blueberries. I don't know if it's the kidney failure OR the deworming medication she's on. Or something else. She was very sick Sunday with vomiting and diarrhea, which might have been caused by her diet. And she was just at the vet last Friday for bloodwork and her physical.

July 27: Both Cookie and Holly are sick with diarrhea. Cookie's is worse. holly's may be from the deworming meds. I'm very very late for work because I had to clean the rug and throw out ALL the dog food and make them chicken and rice. The good thing is my boss is a dog person and understanding.

July 26: Thank you, everyone who posted about Holly. She is eating again and stable. Tests indicate she may have worms, so she starts a new med tonight. It's always delicate with her kidney failure. The good news is she is finally stable after the incident that put her in doggie ICU for a week in April, when we almost lost her. Creatine is 2.2 and BUN is 50. But she will still need supportive SQ fluids each day.

July 22: Holly at the vet for her kidney checkup. Physical went well, hopefully the bloodwork will be good.

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